Finally. Two Birthdays Together.
When I think about the three kids of ours who moved in last May, I am often sad. It is unfair that three of my kids have been moved around like crazy & that the foster care system let them down in a lot of ways. But I came to a realization the other day that blew my mind:
Simple things like this help me keep things in perspective. My kids want to bond. They want to feel safe. They want to stay. They want to wrap their minds around staying, but having two birthdays with us may be great, but it also may trigger the other birthdays and bad memories. They can't undo the past - neither can we.
My prayer is for siblings in foster care to get to stay together. For people to adopt sibling groups that are on their fourth home in two years. These kids need stability & consistency. They need love, therapy & resources to help them attach to someone new, but they deserve people willing to fight for them. They need people to stop their lives for them.
The twins have never celebrated their birthday in the same home.
The twins were born into their birth family almost four years ago. Then, they were moved to their first long term foster family in time for their first birthday. Their second birthday was celebrated with another family who was a long term pre-adoptive foster home. We were lucky enough to celebrate their third birthday with them & they will spend their fourth (and all the rest) with us.
Insane. I can't imagine spending each of my birthdays with a completely different group of people. Thankfully, all three siblings got to stay together in each of these places. Praise God.
Ben and I have to mourn that we missed a total of 9 birthdays of our kids. We missed all of their births, but it breaks my heart that Jacob remembers the twins' first birthday party, but I missed it. Its bittersweet.
My prayer is for siblings in foster care to get to stay together. For people to adopt sibling groups that are on their fourth home in two years. These kids need stability & consistency. They need love, therapy & resources to help them attach to someone new, but they deserve people willing to fight for them. They need people to stop their lives for them.
While every day is hard and brings its own challenges, little things like being able to be the first mom who gets to plan two of their birthday parties is a privilege. I love our little tribe - they are so worth it.
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